Nothing's changed
by tinkerbell2
Summary: A member of the team is attacked and has to come to terms with the fact that history has repeated itself.
1. Cornered

Here's an idea that popped into my head the other day. I'm seriously against the subject matter and that's why I wrote a piece about it. It's not written to offend but to show the pain some people have to live with. Any of the language or phrases used in the story are only used to emphasise and to realistically show how painful the subject matter can be. Anyway please review if you can and all feedback good or bad is always welcome.  
  
It was meant to be a fun night out with the boys. Warrick, Nick and Greg had the night off and had gone club crawling. Eventually at 4AM it was time to call it a day and go home. After exchanging slightly drunken goodbyes, Nick and Greg walked home together and Warrick was left to find his way home alone. Slightly dazed from the intoxicating alcohol he had consumed earlier in the evening he found it hard to steady himself on his feet, however the fresh cold morning air started to sober him up quickly. He was nearly home, nearly safe.  
  
He wanted to get home quickly and the only shortcut he could think of was down a dark and lonely back alley. His judgement, still impaired from the drink, he decided 'what the hell' and quickly wandered along the alleyway. He could see a small light in the distance and he strained his eyes to try and make out the offending object. It looked like the small flickering flame of a lighter, but from this distance it could have been anything.  
  
Taking no notice, Warrick continued walking until he got closer to the object. It was a lighter, the only problem being there were at least six people crowding around it, lighting cigarettes, some that had legal content others, which certainly didn't. When they saw Warrick approaching, they spread out across the narrow alleyway in two rows, making it impossible to get through the human wall that had formed.  
  
"Got any spare change?"  
  
"No sorry," Warrick was scared. His senses had suddenly been heightened by the impending danger that he found himself in.  
  
"You sure about that?" He could just about see the outlines of all the 6 members but any other details apart from that were impossible. The man stood in front of the two rows posing the questions, he presumed to be the leader of the gang.  
  
"Yeah man I'm sure." Suddenly, the man stepped forward and held the lighter up in front of Warrick's face. Warrick studied the man's own face and tried to remember each detail.  
  
"Hey guys we've got ourselves a Black man."  
  
"Hey come on I just wanna get home." Warrick pulled out his wallet from his back pocket knowing full well that it was practically empty, and pulled out the remaining notes. "Look this is all I've got a few dollar bills. Take them and let me be on my way."  
  
The man snatched the bills and flicked the lighter lid down to smother the flame. He replaced the lighter back into his pocket and stared at Warrick. He snarled and looked directly into Warrick's eyes. Warrick was getting increasingly worried, this guy was pretty big, and so were his mates. He was on eye level with him and he looked pretty muscular.  
  
"What do you say boys? Do we let the black man go?"  
  
"What did you say?" Warrick hated racism and against his better judgement he let the comment slip out.  
  
"Oh he's picking a fight now."  
  
The other 5 men started to crowd around Warrick and in the small light coming from the half moon high above, Warrick tried to make out some facial details. He was physically shaking, he knew what was coming and he was going to need all the details he could get, by whatever means possible.  
  
The first punch came from the leader, a solid blow to the stomach that sent Warrick crashing to his knees. Then the inevitable aftermath followed. Kicks and punches came flying from all directions and he soon found himself being held up by two of the group only to be repeatedly punched by the leader until he fell once again heavily to the floor. The punches and kicks ceased and 5 of the 6 men stepped away from the beaten man. The leader however stood right next to Warrick hovering over him like a giant.  
  
The leader looked Warrick up and down and spat on the man below him.  
  
"Take that you Nigger,"  
  
Warrick wanted to form a reply but the metallic taste of the vast content of blood that filled his mouth prevented him from doing so. The immense pain that coursed all the way through his body was somewhat numbed by the pain that the last comment had caused. Soon he felt the darkness enfolding him and unconsciousness inevitably followed.  
  
  
  
I know it's a nasty subject matter but it's a challenge and I hope that people will be supportive. If you could review please do so because I love reading them, the more reviews the merrier I get! Until next time ladies and gentlemen . =) XX 


	2. Skeletons in the closet

Hello again. I am strictly against racism and that's why I'm writing this story. I believe that people should be accepted no matter what skin colour or gender they may be. This story is written to show how awful being judged by appearances can be. Thank you to those you reviewed for the last chapter. Anyway enough said about me here is chapter 2.  
  
Warrick wanted to form a reply but the metallic taste of the vast content of blood that filled his mouth prevented him from doing so. The immense pain that coursed all the way through his body was somewhat numbed by the pain that the last comment had caused. Soon he felt the darkness enfolding him and unconsciousness inevitably followed.  
  
  
  
He woke up cold and shaking, curled up into a tight ball, trying to protect himself from past danger. His whole body ached and even a simple task such as breathing took an immense amount of strength. Warrick gingerly raised a heavily swollen and bruised arm to his mouth and was shocked at the amount of blood that trickled onto his cut hand. He felt physically sick, the coppery taste of blood still fresh in his mouth. He raised his hand further and found his hair to be matted with dried blood. He tried to sit up and was greeted gruffly by a razor-sharp pain that made him breathless momentarily.  
  
Although the pain was agonising, almost paralysing, it proved he was alive, and that was something he was glad to realise. He slowly tried reaching into his coat pocket for his cell phone and to his surprise, and immense relief, he found it to be unbroken. He pressed and held down the '1' key and let his speed dial do the rest.  
  
It seemed to ring for an eternity until finally the desired person picked up.  
  
"Nick." he groggily answered.  
  
"Nick," Warrick winced. "I need your help."  
  
"What's wrong man you sound rough."  
  
"Look I can't explain now, can you come pick me up?"  
  
"Sure I can where are you?"  
  
"I'm not exactly sure. I was on my way home . you know the alleyway. the shortcut on the way to my house? I think I'm half way down that."  
  
"Yeah man I know. What's happened?"  
  
"Just get here ok?"  
  
"I'll be there in 5 minutes, just hold on man."  
  
Nick hung up and Warrick dropped the cell to the floor. He retreated back onto the floor, he deduced he had a cracked rib, maybe even several and sitting up wasn't doing any good. He just had to wait for Nick to find him. He was just so tired. maybe he could get some sleep before Nick got here.  
  
Nick stormed over to where Warrick had described. The journey would normally have taken 15 minutes but Nick stepped on the gas and got across town to Warrick's area in no time. He looked at his watch and realised it was only 8AM. He found the alleyway with ease and cut the ignition and locked the car in a matter of seconds. He ran up the alleyway, his eyes darting around to find his friend. He turned a corner only to find Warrick unconscious on the floor. His body cold but still shaking. Shaking was good it meant he was still alive.  
  
He crouched down next to the body and reached out a hand to Warrick blood coated face. He tapped his friends face lightly. "Warrick."  
  
He was aware of a voice; it just seemed so far away. Was it Nick? His eyes fluttered open and after focusing on the form before him he recognised it as Nick.  
  
"Man what happened to you?"  
  
"I got jumped on my way home. a gang of about 5 or 6."  
  
"Geez man, Hang on in there I'm calling an ambulance."  
  
"Good cos I don't think I can walk to the hospital," Warrick huffed out a small laugh and Nick smiled.  
  
Nick thumped the numbers frantically into his cell and tapped the back of it impatiently waiting for the operator to pick up. "Ambulance please."  
  
  
  
  
  
In no time at all they had both reached the hospital and Warrick had been whisked away into the intensive care. Nick sat in the waiting room impatiently wondering what to do. He picked up his cell and pondered slowly on who to call first. Grissom was the obvious choice. He pressed the 'call' key and waited impatiently once more for someone to pick up.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Look Gris I know this is early but it's serious. Warrick's been beaten up, pretty badly. He was walking home from the club last night and he got jumped in an alleyway. He said there were about 5 or 6 of them. He's really not in good shape Grissom."  
  
"Ok Nick calm down. I'll be there ASAP. I'll let the rest of the team know, we'll all be there."  
  
"Thanks Gris."  
  
"Bye Nick."  
  
The phone clicked and Nick replaced his own cell back into his jeans pocket. He nervously chewed on his already short fingernails and waited anxiously for the team to come. This was all his fault. If only he'd walked home with him then this would never have happened. Something occurred to Nick. Warrick still had his cell. So it wasn't just a normal mugging.? He hoped it wasn't what he thought it was but he'd just have to wait and find out and hear it from Warrick. That's if Warrick remembered anything about it.  
  
An hour passed until every single member of the team had arrived at the hospital and still there had been no word from the doctors on Warrick's condition. Every minute that passed grew bursting with fear and you could almost read the thoughts of the other people in the waiting room. Everyone in that room was family. And now Warrick, one of that close-knit family, was lying in a hospital bed.  
  
When Greg pronounced there was a doctor coming then the team all simultaneously took a deep breath, holding on for the news that seemed to take an eternity in coming. What if it was bad news.? What if Warrick hadn't survived? Nick had said he was in bad shape. It just didn't bear thinking about.  
  
"Hello, I'm doctor Green. I presume you're here on behalf of Warrick Brown."  
  
Grissom stepped forward, always the leader. "Yes we are. Is he alright doctor?"  
  
"Alive yes. Alright no."  
  
Catherine gasped and Greg rushed to her side to help her stay standing.  
  
"What's wrong with doctor?"  
  
"Well, He's lost an awful lot of blood and he's broken quite a few bones."  
  
"Just tell us the prognosis,"  
  
"3 ribs, his nose, his ulna, he's bruised and broken and needed an overall of 24 stitches. However, He's conscious and stable. You can see him if you want but not for long."  
  
"Thank you doctor." Grissom turned to face his associates. "Come on then guys, let's go see Warrick."  
  
Grissom followed the doctor, and the team trailed behind Grissom. They couldn't prepare themselves for what they'd see in the room, it could be Warrick sitting up looking cheerful, but that was just an unrealistic hope. Sara was 2nd into the room, and was shocked at how her friend looked. He'd been beaten to within an inch of his life by the looks of it.  
  
"Hey guys," Warrick whispered.  
  
"Hey Warrick, How are you?" Sara rolled her eyes at her own question. "Don't answer that."  
  
Warrick laughed slightly and winced at the sudden pain.  
  
"Look man who did this to you?"  
  
"Trust you Nick to cut to the chase." Warrick looked at his friend. "I don't know . it was dark."  
  
The group chatted for a while before the doctor ushered them out and reluctantly they left the hospital room, except for Nick.  
  
"Man I know you, it may have been dark but you would've seen them. I bet you studied their faces didn't you?"  
  
"Yeah I did. Trained CSI and all that."  
  
"There's no easy way to ask this Warrick but did they beat you up because."  
  
"Because I'm black?"  
  
"Well yeah."  
  
"Yeah. They started calling me a nigger and everything."  
  
"Geez man,"  
  
"Yeah well its just history repeating itself."  
  
"What the hell's that meant to mean?"  
  
"We've all got skeletons in the closet Nick, I've got mine the same as everyone else."  
  
"You gonna share them with me?"  
  
"How long have you got man?"  
  
  
  
Please R&R and reviews are always appreciated hint hint. Feedback would be also greatly appreciated. Until next time ladies and gentlemen . =) XX 


	3. Emotions

I love writing, so even though I try to have space between the chapters I just can't seem to do it! All reviews (i.e. any reviews at all that people could possibly spare the time to write!) would be greatly appreciated. You get to see Warrick's past through my eyes in this chapter (still deals with racism issues).  
  
"We've all got skeletons in the closet Nick, I've got mine the same as everyone else."  
  
"You gonna share them with me?"  
  
"How long have you got man?"  
  
  
  
"I've got all the time in the world man."  
  
"I knew you'd say that."  
  
"Well."  
  
"I grew up in a rough neighbourhood, I was always in scuffles and my mom always warned me not to get too involved. I started hanging with a bad crowd. Anyway to cut a long story short."  
  
"No way I want the whole story." Nick interrupted.  
  
"Fine. This crowd one night got dosed up on pills; you know 'e' and all that. They went round smashing up cars and beat up a guy pretty bad. I didn't go with them that night but the police came knocking on my door all the same. I had to ship them in, there was no way they could prove that I wasn't there and if I didn't clear my name I'd go down with the rest of them. In the end they all got off, there was no proof or evidence to say that they did it and they knew who had grassed them up. They came looking for me one night. Lets just say I ended up like the guy that they beat up before."  
  
"But that wasn't a racist attack Warrick."  
  
"That one wasn't but that's when it all started. See, my mom and I, we had to move and we ended up in a white-neighbourhood. I got more black eyes in the first week than I'd got in the whole of my life. Just because I was different to them they made it their business to beat the crap out of me all the time. One night I was coming back from a date, I'd dropped off the girl and I was nearly home. I remember them calling my name; they surrounded me and started taking the mickey. Being young and therefore inevitably stupid, I tried fighting my way out of it. They just started calling me a troublemaker and then they just all laid into me. If you can believe it I was worse then than I am now. One of the gang got a pen ."  
  
"A pen?"  
  
"Man, do you ever let anyone finish a story?"  
  
"Sorry,"  
  
"Anyway, like I was saying, one of them got a pen and wrote 'nigger' on my forehead. Sick eh?"  
  
"Man what did you do?" The shock was plain to hear in Nick's voice. His expression said it all.  
  
"Nothing, I was in hospital for a long, long time. I was in a coma for 5 days."  
  
"But didn't you tell the police?"  
  
"I didn't. But my mom did. She knew who it had been. She shipped them in. But that meant moving again. We moved to New York, and I started college there and then once I'd qualified I came to Vegas."  
  
"Geez man, I never knew."  
  
"Well you weren't expected to. Its just history repeating itself now though isn't it?"  
  
"I am gonna hunt these bastards down Warrick. I promise I will not let them beat you ever again. But there's one thing you have to do for me."  
  
"Give you details yeah?"  
  
"Yeah, you got it man."  
  
With that the doctor entered the room once more. "I thought I said time was up. Mr brown here needs his rest."  
  
Nick smiled at the doctor and turned once more to his bedridden friend. "I'll be back tomorrow, you can tell me then ok?"  
  
"That's cool with me. Just don't tell anyone just yet ok? I don't want them to all feel sorry for me."  
  
"Ok but they're gonna find out some time or another."  
  
"I know, but just not yet. There's no need to get everyone's backs up."  
  
"Ok, it's not my place to say anyway, it's yours so I'm leaving it up to you when you think the time is right."  
  
"How did I know you were gonna say that?"  
  
"Cos I'm always right!" Nick winked at Warrick and exited the room. Warrick sighed. He hadn't told anyone about his past before and although it felt good to get the weight off his shoulders, he felt exposed. Nick was a good mate, even his best mate, but somehow he just felt uneasy sharing such personal details about his past. Everyone had skeletons in the closet but that's what they are meant to stay as, aren't they? Warrick didn't have long to think about it though; soon he drifted off into a peaceful sleep.  
  
Nick wandered back to his SUV and drove quickly to the CSI HQ. Too many thoughts were going through his head for him to concentrate fully on driving. Too many thoughts to be feeling easy. How could he keep this from the others? They had a right to know so that they could search for . search for what? The sick bastards who did this? The racists. Racism always made Nick mad. People of any colour, gender etc are just that people. Just because they're different doesn't make them anything other than equals. He thumped the steering wheel in his obvious frustration. If anyone was going to figure out that it was a racist attack, it was going to be Grissom. Sara and Catherine would try to believe it was just some men out drunk, starting trouble and getting into loads of it. Nick now knew it wasn't and he didn't know where the hell to start about stopping it.  
  
Once arriving at the labs, Nick quickly made his way to the locker rooms. He wasn't ready to confront anyone just yet. They'd all want to know what Warrick had said after they'd left and he wasn't going to be the one to tell them. That was indeed Warrick's job. However, there were certain leads he could go on, he just had to disassociate himself with the case, even if it was Warrick.  
  
Whilst Nick got changed, the break room was a centre of chaos. There was shock, anger and determination all making an appearance. Grissom was, as per usual, the voice of reason to all of the remaining people in the office. Sara was angry as hell; Greg was quiet in the corner with Catherine who was gloomily devouring a cup of cold, stale, coffee. Brass was pacing the room in opposite directions to Sara and his face was a picture of pure determination.  
  
"I am going to get the SOB who did this."  
  
"I'm gonna kill them. How dare they do that to Warrick?" Sara's veins protruded out of her neck.  
  
"To them, our Warrick was just another person. Another victim. He wasn't any specific person." Grissom said calmly. They'd been like this for most of the morning and now as afternoon was coming around they were all still feeling the same emotions that they had been for the past few hours. Grissom was upset as well. He just didn't show it. Someone had to be strong for the rest of them. He just had to wait until Nick got here so that he could confront him about something, just not in front of the rest of the team.  
  
As if by magic, Nick appeared and padded his way in to the break room. "Hey Nick,"  
  
"Hi Grissom,"  
  
"We need to talk, lets go to my office."  
  
Nick gulped, he knew. Grissom knew exactly what had happened to Warrick. And now Nick was going to have to face the music. Why couldn't life just be easy? Grissom opened the door to his office and ushered Nick inside. "Sit down Nick."  
  
"Thanks." He sat down and tried not to give away anything.  
  
"I know why Warrick was attacked. But it's alright I don't want you to tell me because after you hung back at the hospital I presume he told you not to tell me why. Am I right?"  
  
Nick nodded the affirmative.  
  
"Ok then, well we better start getting some work done, the others are just sorting their emotions out at the moment. We should leave them to finish that and then they'll come back to work, agreed?"  
  
"Agreed."  
  
"And I also presume you're going to go see Warrick again tomorrow?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I'm coming with you, I want all the details. No one hurts a member of our family and gets away with it."  
  
Nick nodded. He knew Grissom was coming to the hospital tomorrow whether he liked it or not. It was just Warrick now to deal with.  
  
  
  
Please please please review! I love reading all feedback (hint hint!) Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Until next time ladies and gentlemen =) XX 


	4. Psychosomatic

Hello, sorry this chapter took so long, it's just I didn't get a response for the last chapter so I thought I'd give up. Anyway to cut a long story short in my opinion a story that's been started has to be finished so hopefully that's what I'm going to do. To all Nick fans out there I'm going to start a new Nick story at the start of December so please look out for that one. For now however please read on and review my story about Warrick. This chapter is from his Point of View.  
  
I hate hospitals. I think I've been in them way to many times in my life. 'Pain is purely psychosomatic' yeah of course it is. What dumbass came up with that? If it's purely psychosomatic then why the hell am I in agony right now? I don't even want to be in this stupid hospital. I could be at home licking my wounds, recovering in a place that's familiar to me. Not all the people I know coming in and looking at the beat up guy.  
  
I know, I know that was harsh but it's true. I feel like a charity case even though the team aren't treating me like one. Wait until they find out why this happened. Oh the questions! I hate racists and racism itself but I never once thought that I'd be in the same position as I was so many years ago. I bet Nick's already told Grissom, actually Grissom probably figured it out himself, that guy is bright.  
  
All the same, there's nothing to do in this damn hospital but to think, sleep and look up at the stark white ceiling and walls and wish I were somewhere else. Nick's coming in later, great. I would bet money on the fact that he'll bring Grissom. Well obviously I won't bet I gave that all up a long time ago. Someone's death on your conscience can do that to a person. No one ever blamed me directly but sometimes when her name's mentioned around the office I swear I can hear their thoughts. 'It's Warrick's fault that she died.'  
  
When you look at me what do you see? A confident, attractive, young man who has his whole life ahead of him. Is that what you really see? If it is you don't know me at all. Most days I come to work and hope that there's a dangerous case that I have to go to. It's like that City High song. I heard it for the first time and I knew one single line of the lyrics just applied to me. 'Every day I wake up hoping to die,' Ok maybe it's a slight exaggeration but it's true for most of the time. My life is going nowhere. The only good thing is, or rather was, my job and that's been tainted.  
  
And the only person I could turn to in the whole wide world has gone, my mom. No one knows. I didn't even tell Grissom. She died a couple of months ago; sudden heart attack. I bet it's all the stress I gave her. I took the day off and went to New York for her funeral. She's the only person in my life who has ever cared about me and stuck up for me and now I'm never going to see her again. She'd hate to see me like this. Bed ridden in hospital, I let her down so many times when she was alive and even when she's passed on I still manage to cock things up.  
  
So many times I haven't been able to defend myself and now it's happening all over again. I always smile when I think of what she used to tell me whenever I was down. She used to pull me in close to her and whisper softly in my ear, 'Don't let anybody get you down boy, cos there ain't no one better than you.' Then she used to get her favourite scarf and wrap it around me and tell me that even when she wasn't around that she'd always be with me. All I had to do was have faith. I love that old scarf. It smells of her vanilla perfume. I bought her so many scarves over the years and she stuck to that one. I've got it now. Whenever I'm down I just wrap it around my neck and close my eyes and breathe in her, well her spirit anyway.  
  
She always used to sing a song to me before I went to bed. She had the most beautiful voice; it still haunts my dreams and my waking thoughts. When she sang her whole heart went into the words, and even when she was tired or ill she still always found the strength needed to sing that one special song to me. It was one she made up when I was younger. She made it up because, as she said, 'you'll never hear it on the radio and no one will ever steal it from us.' And it's true. It's hers and mine song. I remember the words.  
  
"There was a star, above in the sky, That comes to catch you whenever you cry, There's a moon that shines on you And follows you whatever you do And there's a sun just like you It shines the whole night through There's a river, that meets the sea, That meets the ocean, wild and free Now hush, goodnight, sleep tight, Just remember I'll be hugging you all night.'  
  
She used to finish it off with a hug and a kiss on my forehead. I cried so many times when she sang me that song. Somehow, it made me think of the days when she wasn't going to be around to sing it to me, and I'd be left on my own to fill in the gaps. I still feel her around me all the time. She was an only child and so was I. My dad left when I was 3 and I found out a few years ago that he'd died. I was the only one she had on this earth so it makes sense that she'd come back and be with me. I wasn't there when she died. I'd talked to her the night before though. It's funny, that phone call was the strangest we'd ever had. I told her so many times that I loved her and missed her and she told me that even when she wasn't around that she'd always be there for me. Maybe she knew. Maybe she knew she was going to die. I'm just glad I told her how I felt. I don't remember saying goodbye at the end of the phone call.  
  
That's my one regret in life, well apart from Holly. Mom always wanted to be cremated so I made sure I did that for her. I still have her ashes. I never knew where to scatter them. There never seemed a beautiful enough place for her. She was the most beautiful woman, outside and in, she deserved to be surrounded with equalling beauty.  
  
I think about her a lot. I thought about her on the night of the attack. Walking home, dark and alone, she never would've approved. She would've whooped my behind if she knew.  
  
The nurse just came in to tell me I have visitors. guess who? Now my body aches more with the pain of not having my mother here to get me through this. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe, after all, it's true the only pain I'm feeling now is in my head so that can only mean one thing. Pain is psychosomatic.  
  
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope it was alright and that you enjoyed it. Please I beg of you please R & R it would make my own little world a much nicer place to be. Thank you again. All reviews and feedback greatly appreciated and most certainly welcome. Until next time ladies and gentlemen . =) XX 


	5. Point of View

Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter and persuading me not to give up on my writing. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm sorry it's taken a while to update I'm revising at the moment for some exams so it's finding the time. This chapter is Point of Views from three different characters but mostly Warrick. Hope you enjoy and please R&R as I appreciate them all good or bad. Chapter 5.  
  
It's hard knowing what to say when there's nothing you can say to express how you truly feel. It's also hard trying to think of specific words to mend a situation that can't be fixed. You can say I'm sorry or I wish this hadn't happened, and you be telling the truth, but sometimes the statements just hold false pretences of what you actually meant to say. I was faced with this dilemma this morning on the way to the hospital with Nick.  
  
I prepare myself every day for cases, the worst possible cases, and in doing so I cope with the horror. But somehow it seems unreal that this has happened to such a gentle and kind young man. Warrick has made mistakes, everyone has, but he doesn't deserve this. And whilst Nick, after a hard night shift, facing away, leaning against the window steaming it up with his heavy breathing, slept peacefully, I was trying to figure out what to say. I'm the leader of the group who's always meant to know what to say but what can you say? Nothing I say is going to make Warrick feel better about how this situation has worked out, neither is it going to erase the period of time that he'd like to get rid of from his life.  
  
I tried calling his mother this morning. I thought she had a right to know. I went to the staff records and found the number and reluctantly and hesitantly I dialled the unfamiliar number. I said hello and asked if this was Mrs. Brown. I was shocked with the reply. I was shocked because I realised the Warrick's mother had been dead for a couple of months and he hadn't told any of us.  
  
Suddenly, the jigsaw finally came together. The day off Warrick had taken a while back; it had been his mother's funeral. This fact disturbed me. Warrick hadn't wanted any of us to know. He either hadn't trusted us or didn't want to burden us. Either way he'd dealt with it all on his own and he had no plans of telling the team, when maybe we could've eased the pain.  
  
I realised how self-absorbed I am. I hadn't even noticed at the time that Warrick had seemed down. I simply assumed that is was down to the fact it was the anniversary of holly's death, and if that was the case those were Warrick's demons to work through. No one can help you when the only person who can make it better is yourself. After a week or so he'd returned to normal, and I thought nothing of it. How could I have missed something so blatant? Why didn't I think to ask at the time? I'm meant to be his boss, and more importantly his friend and I let him deal with everything on his own. How am I meant to bring this up when I get to the hospital? Anyway I say it it's going to sound like I've been snooping. Well I'm just going to have to cross that bridge when I come to it.  
  
  
  
He thinks I'm asleep. I've been staring out of the window pretending to do so for the past half an hour. I've got too many thoughts buzzing around in my head to talk. Grissom found out something this morning. I can tell. Grissom's like an open book, when something's puzzling him it shows. I can see the way his eyebrows knot together and the way his hand reaches to his forehead to try and relieve some tension. I know Grissom was calling Warrick's mother this morning. I wonder what he found out. Maybe she told him that this has happened before. If so then I'm off the hook.  
  
I've dealt with a lot in my life but it hurts me even more to think that someone would do what they did to Warrick just because of the colour of his skin. Just because he may look different doesn't mean he is. He's an equal and it's sickening to think of the judgemental racists who think otherwise.  
  
I was beaten up in college once. I remember the guy shouting my name down the alleyway as I ran away from him. 'Nick,' he yelled over an over again. I was petrified and there was only one of him. I can't begin to imagine how Warrick felt that night. In my view wounds heal a lot quicker when you're younger because you can always say it wasn't your fault. What happened when I was nine was unfortunate, maybe even tragic, definitely sick, but it wasn't my fault and when I think of that time in college when that guy beat me to a pulp I know it was my fault.  
  
When you're young and innocent things can be let go, people forgive you for your actions because your small and you don't know what you're doing, but when you're older the consequences of your actions catch up with you. Warrick hadn't even done anything to provoke them. And they just took it into their own hands to make sure they made his life hell. I'm determined to get them, No one does that and gets away with it.  
  
I'm still curious about Grissom though. What did he find out this morning that's puzzled him so much? I guess I'll find out at the hospital.  
  
  
  
They're coming in any minute. I don't know if I can face Grissom and Nick asking me questions just yet. Nick knows about my past, Grissom probably does by now, but somehow that doesn't make the past or indeed the present any easier to talk about. I feel numb at the moment. Why can't I just let this go? Why? Because if I let it go some other person who's 'different' to these Neanderthal racists may not be as lucky as me.  
  
Lucky, not exactly a term I'd use, I'm alive. Maybe it would have been better if I'd died. I could be with mom again. I had a week or so after mom died and it was my funeral. Nick was standing giving the eulogy and I even remember what he was saying.  
  
" There haven't been many people in my life who I have trusted and loved with all of my heart and soul. But today from the bottom of my broken heart, I'm here to say goodbye to one of them. Warrick understood me more than most people. Very few people in my life have understood me and even fewer have accepted me for the way I am. But you did. So I guess what I'm trying to say man, is that I miss you."  
  
I'd woken up crying that morning. It had felt so real. And now I was in hospital kind of wishing that it was real because then at least I wouldn't have to deal with this overwhelming feeling of helplessness and uselessness.  
  
I keep focusing on the door waiting for their painted on counterfeit smiles to peek around the door. However, Nick looks around with a worried expression on his face that is only beaten by Grissom's puzzled look. Grissom knows, it's easy enough to see that. But there's something else hiding behind his blue eyes, a burning question to ask me that I fear. My hands shake of their own accord and they become clammy and hot. I wipe them on the white bed sheets, so as not to give away my anxiety.  
  
Grissom sits down in the chair nearest to me and before I can even say hello he voices his burning question.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?" I feel like my heart just felt from my chest and down into the pit of my stomach. I don't know how he knows about mom but he does. I can tell. But I have to bluff it.  
  
"Well, I thought I'd just say it was a normal attack I didn't want history to be repeating itself."  
  
"Not that. You know what I'm talking about Warrick."  
  
"Sorry." I try to mask my heartache with confusion and as I do this Nick turns to Grissom with the reflection of my mask on his own face.  
  
"Grissom what are you going on about?" Nick voices his obvious bewilderment and hopes for an answer.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me Warrick? I'm your friend aren't I? I could have helped you I've been there. I didn't even think of it at the time. I just thought you were upset because it was the anniversary of Holly's death and I let it go. The day of you took, I thought it was strange but I thought maybe just maybe, you were going to visit Holly's grave so I left you to your own devices. Why didn't you tell me where you were going? I would have come, given you some moral support."  
  
By now I was nearly crying. The tears had welled up in my eyes and Nick and Grissom were just colourful blurs of emotion.  
  
"Why should I have told you Grissom? Would you have cared? No one else did. Do you know how many people were at her funeral? 3. My mother was a saint, someone who would do anything for anybody and no one had the time of day of presence of mind to show their respect for her. She was the only person in the world who has ever given a damn about me and stuck up for me and now your asking me why I didn't tell you she'd died? How dare you Grissom?"  
  
"Calm down Warrick. There's no need to shout."  
  
"There's every right to shout! Do you know how numb I've felt for the past few months. I've felt empty, hollow inside. When she died part of me went with her because she was all I ever had. No one in this whole damn world will ever replace or measure up to her in my eyes. You didn't even ask me at the time. If you thought something was wrong how come you didn't ask me then instead of waiting for me to end up in a state like this and then confronting me about it?"  
  
Nick sat silently, his bewilderment having disappeared and now his embarrassment showing as he, the same as Grissom hadn't noticed how I'd felt back then. I forgave Nick back then. It was just after Nigel had been around and he had enough to deal with but Grissom just decided to leave me to my own devices and now he comes and asks me how I am? It's just not right and it sure as hell isn't fair.  
  
I took a deep breath and suddenly my pent up emotions, all the bad feeling I'd kept inside came out in a string of sentences. "When this happened before, when I was younger she was the one who helped me face up to my fears. She was the one who made all the bad things go away. She defended me so that I didn't have to feel bad just because of who or what I was. And now the one person who I want to be here isn't and never will be because she's gone. Probably from all the stress I gave her and I'll never have the chance to say how miss I miss her and love her. I never even got to say goodbye Grissom."  
  
That was it. The floodgates just opened. And no matter how much I wanted to remain strong in front of my two colleagues and friends I let go. I wanted to stay angry at Grissom for not noticing my pain but instead I let him comfort me and hold me in his arms. He somehow felt like a father figure, he had done for a long time, but I was just so angry at him.  
  
I answered all the questions that I knew had to be asked and I talked about my past with Grissom. He wasn't shocked and he didn't say those meaningless phrases of I'm sorry or I wish this hadn't happened. He didn't try telling me that everything would be alright, that he could help me fix what was broken. Instead he just said what he felt. And that means so much more. I know it was hard for him deciding what to say but instead of giving me the spiel he told me what he felt. And I respect him for that.  
  
Nick's cell rang but neither me or Grissom heard it, too engrossed in our conversation. Nick went outside the room to answer it and when he came back he looked white as a sheet. Replacing his cell in his pocket he looked at me. "Warrick the night of the attack. did they get your wallet?"  
  
"I don't know. you'll have to check with the hospital. Why?"  
  
"There's been a break in at your house. The place has been trashed."  
  
I felt breathless and sick simultaneously. Their after me . Why? 


	6. It was all a dream

It's been a while coming it's just been a little hectic over here in Never- Never land! (Bad joke I know!) Anyway Please R&R as all feedback and criticism is welcome.  
  
Chapter 6.  
  
"What do you mean someone's broken in?' I managed to scrape the words out of my mouth. My throat dry and my mouth raw, burning with questions but frozen shut with shock. Grissom gripped onto my hand, as Nick looked at me full of concern.  
  
"I'm sorry Warrick, Sara found it this morning. She went round to get you some fresh clothes and she found it trashed. Catherine and Sara are processing it as we speak."  
  
"I can't believe it ." It just didn't register. Wasn't beating me to within an inch of my life enough? Why did these people have to go and wreck my house too?  
  
"Look Warrick you're just shocked. Nick, you stay with him and I'll go meet Catherine and Sara. We'll process it in no time if we all pitch in."  
  
"Ok boss I'll drop by the lab later. You can fill me in then."  
  
"That's fine."  
  
I have no privacy left, no pride left, no personal property or dignity. I've been violated all over again. Why didn't they just kill me when they had the chance? Why am I always left to suffer? I just want to go to sleep. I don't care if Nick's here. He can sit in that chair until midnight for all I care.  
  
"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" " The metallic, coppery taste of blood graces my mouth once again and I'm left feeling vulnerable. I feel the kicks and punches coming from all directions and yet I feel no pain. I can see the blood and I go to stroke it to make sure it's actually there but it disappears on touch.  
  
What's happening to me? I don't recognise where I am, and I can't see anyone although I can feel them tormenting my body. I can hear Grissom. He's shouting my name. I try to yell but nothing comes out of my mouth. Blood runs freely out of my mouth and down my torso, flowing like a river. That's not normal. Where the hell am I? I can see Grissom now. He's stood a little way away. And Nick's there too. And Sara and Catherine. I try to stand up but my legs give way from underneath me. I try yelling once again but I can't make a sound. They're still shouting my name begging me to come to them. I want to but my body feels like lead, too heavy to move and to heavy to stay. I'm crying now. I can't move and neither can they. They're telling me that they've got to go away, that they can't stay any longer; I'm on my own.  
  
I can hear someone else. It's mom. She's whispering my name. She says that she's got something important to tell me. She says grab her hand. She's come to help me, to take me away from here. What does she want to tell me? She's starting to speak but I can't hear her. Mom.! I can yell now but she can't hear me. Mom."  
  
"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" "  
  
"Warrick! Warrick!"  
  
It's Nick he's calling for me.  
  
"Warrick! Come on Man wake up!"  
  
And I do. Suddenly I focus on him and he looks pale, white as a sheet to be precise. He looks frightened, worried.  
  
I gulp quickly to try and regain composure. It was all a dream. No one left me. And I didn't see my mom. My eyes avert themselves over to the window and it's dark again. How long have I been asleep?  
  
"For a long time man."  
  
Oops I didn't realise I'd said that out loud.  
  
"It's ok man, you were having a nightmare."  
  
I frown. It felt like one too.  
  
"Why did you wake me up?"  
  
"Well, I've just had a phone call off Brass. When I came back in you were shouting so I woke you. I thought you might want to know the news."  
  
"Which is ."  
  
"There are prints all over your place. 6 different sets of prints. All full none partial. And all have been found in AFIS." Nick smiled at me.  
  
"It was that easy?" I don't believe it. Maybe he's just sugarcoating it for me. Maybe he doesn't want to tell me the truth.  
  
"Yep it's that easy. I have never ever known criminals to be so dumb." He guffawed at his own remark.  
  
"Me neither. So what happens now?"  
  
"Well that's the bad news. Brass hasn't tracked them down yet but hey he will so don't worry."  
  
The doctor's just poked his head around the door. I have a visitor. Wouldn't give a name apparently. I told him to let them in whoever they are. He's a tall Caucasian, muscular, and I don't know where but I have seen him somewhere before. And then it comes to me in a lightning flash. I know exactly where I've seen him before. it was .  
  
Hope you enjoyed that. Thought I'd add a little bit of suspense and some drama to this story. Please R&R and hopefully chapter 7 will come quicker than chapter 6! Until next time ladies and gentlemen . =) XX 


	7. Bang

Hello everyone. I'm hoping to finish this story up soon, however this chapter just came to me and I had to write it! Thank you for past reviews it's really nice to know people read my drivel. Anyway Chapter 7 I believe.  
  
  
  
The doctor's just poked his head around the door. I have a visitor. Wouldn't give a name apparently. I told him to let them in whoever they are. He's a tall Caucasian, muscular, and I don't know where but I have seen him somewhere before. And then it comes to me in a lightning flash. I know exactly where I've seen him before. it was .  
  
"Nick!"  
  
"What Warrick?"  
  
"It's him!" I manage to grate out, frightened at the presence of one of my attackers in what's supposed to be a safe place. He's moving closer to the bed just staring at Nick and I. I can see Nick's hand slowly reaching round to his back for his loaded gun but he decides against it. The guy's too close he'd see it.  
  
"I'm glad you recognise me Mr. Brown."  
  
"How do you know my name?"  
  
"You're all over the news. I thought I'd pay a visit."  
  
"What?" I couldn't believe it. The team hadn't mentioned me being on the news.  
  
"Well, I thought we could have some private time. It seems you might have given too much away about me and my friends."  
  
I'm angry now. This bastard broke into my house and has made my life a living hell for days and he's accusing me of being unfair. "Sure, whatever. Nick Can you leave us alone for a minute?" He catches my drift and gets up slowly. He moves slowly around the man but before he can get the whole way around the guy quickly flicks a gun out from behind his coat and uses the butt to crash into Nick's temple. He crashes to the floor with a pronounced thud and I can only just see his feet from my position on the bed. I imagine the white-hot pain that's spreading through his head right now and I can't help but wish I could jump out of this bed and rush to his aid.  
  
"Don't try to out smart me Mr Brown. You thought your friend could get me from behind? Was that it? You see I know exactly who you are even if you don't know who I am. I don't need the news to know."  
  
I focus on his features, wracking my brain to try and find out where I've seen him before but it just doesn't click.  
  
"Now this is disappointing. I'll give you a clue, Warrick. You've put me in jail before now. Is it coming back to you yet?"  
  
And it did. Just like that. Danny Medosa. The guy who'd lived on the estate. The crowd who'd hated me from day one, just because I was different to them. The crowd who my mom got arrested and they got sent down for attacking me. I should've known. Well no I shouldn't how was I to know that he'd come looking for me?  
  
"Why did you look for me?" I needed to know.  
  
"I didn't. I came to Vegas a while ago after I got out. Thought I'd gamble some cash and see if I could get my life back on track. However, one day I ran into a face from the past. You."  
  
"I don't remember running into you."  
  
"You wouldn't. At the time you were on a crime scene. A coffee house burglary. I was just one of the many faces in the crowd. Since I knew you lived here now I decided to do some investigating. And look here, it's amazing what can happen isn't it?"  
  
"But you couldn't have known I'd be walking home that way that night. It's not possible. I didn't even know I was walking home that way until I did."  
  
"Purely a chance meeting. I do a little bit of dealing on the side you see. A few friends of mine needed a new stash and we met up."  
  
"At 4AM?"  
  
"What can I say? I work anti social hours. I knew it was you as soon as you got near enough. I knew what I wanted to do and luckily my friends helped me. They were pretty dosed up though, some don't even know they did it."  
  
"And my house?"  
  
"That was just purely for spite. I've known where you lived for a long time. I thought I might as well case the joint whilst I was in the neighbourhood so to speak." He smiled at me, his eyes displaying how much pent up anger and revenge had built up over the years.  
  
The gun rose to bed level and his hand drew in firmly around the trigger. This is some scary stuff. I've never been in a situation like this and Nick isn't getting up off the floor. Why can't the doctor just come in? I can't think of anything to do. We're trained for these situations but none of them contain on how to deal with a revenge stricken mad man posing over your hospital bed with a gun. I could try talking him out of it.  
  
"Danny, I'm sure you don't want to do this. You'd go back to jail. The doctor saw you come in and so did Nick. You'd never get away with this." Not exactly smooth there.  
  
"Do you think I care? I hated you so long ago and it's never subsided that hate. I fantasised about this day in prison when I could finally finish the job I set out to do long ago. So long Warrick, Go join your Mother."  
  
He's pointing the gun directly at my head and I can see down into the barrel of the gun. My breathing has completely stopped as I brace myself for what's inevitably to come. I shut my one eye and turn my head slightly away from the gun. I hear the all too familiar click and then.  
  
.. Bang.  
  
  
  
Hope you liked this chapter. It's been a long time in coming I know. Please R&R and all feedback is appreciated. Until next time ladies and gentlemen . ( =) XX 


	8. Shock

Thank you fawkes21 for your kind words I was extremely grateful to hear from you. Today, not only am I updating this story (because it's Christmas and all) I'm going to try and attempt to update ALL of my stories today and add a new story! Sheesh I'm a busy girl! Anyway, just for you fawkes. Chapter 8.  
  
I hear the all too familiar click and then.  
  
.. Bang.  
  
  
  
I can't feel any pain. I'm just lying here trying to keep still, not quite knowing whether I'm alive or dead. I cautiously open up one of my eyes and look around the room. He's gone. Danny Medosa.. he's gone, but where? I peer over the bed to check on Nick and find out where Danny is. His chest is bleeding and his face is mangled into a look of agonising pain and fear.  
  
His chest is bleeding, heavily. A deep maroon nearly black liquid that flows freely over his torso.  
  
But who.? My thoughts are interrupted briefly when I hear...  
  
"You alright buddy?" I hear a familiar Texan drawl coming from somewhere.  
  
"I think so. What just happened?"  
  
"I shot him."  
  
"But I thought you were gone with the fairies man you looked completely out of it."  
  
"Yeah Mr. Medosa thought that too." He picks himself up and uses the bed to lever himself to a standing position. Dropping the gun to the floor he raises a hand gingerly to his bleeding temple.  
  
"That's going to leave a mark." He says smiling at me. The guy just saved my life. Nick just saved my life. I can hear crying and feel tears and for a second or too I don't realise it's me. I'm the one crying.  
  
"Nick you just .. You just saved my life."  
  
"I know. Don't worry I expect you to return the favour one day." He smiles at me again. "I've got to make some phone calls. Will you be alright?"  
  
"Just get someone in here to get rid of him ASAP." Staring at the dead body of my foe.  
  
"Will do."  
  
As he follows my gaze towards Danny he reaches for his cell and dials Brass' number. I know this only when Nick mentions his name and after that I tune out of the conversation unable to focus on any specific train of thought. Apart from one.  
  
I could have died.  
  
But Nick saved me.  
  
Danny's dead. It's finally over.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Nick clicked his cell phone off and stared at Warrick. He was pretty shaken up but who wouldn't be in his situation. Right now Nick needed to get his head sorted out, literally. The blood wasn't ceasing despite the constant pressure he had on it and the pain throbbing through his whole cranium was unbearable. He couldn't remember a time when he'd been in this much physical pain. Neither had he been so surprised as he was right now. He'd just shot a guy, a person, and he felt no remorse. Faced with the possible outcome he knew he'd done the right thing. Warrick was like a best friend to him, and the thought of not having him around made him shudder.  
  
Warrick was shaking, Nick could see how quickly Warrick's personal demons had literally been shot down and now he didn't know how to rid them from this clinical hospital room. Somehow it was comforting to still see the corpse on the floor, it meant he was definitely dead. It meant he was definitely out of Warrick's life and Nick knew this was a good thing. Warrick had been scared for long enough, it was time to forget this and move on.  
  
It's hard looking down the barrel of a gun, Nick had done that not so long ago, with Nigel Crane and he'd never been so relieved to have some one come to his rescue as he had been then. And he realised right then how relieved Warrick probably was. What Warrick would never know was that Nick would think about this day for a long time to come. No matter who the person was it was still a life that had been snuffed out, it's flame taken away. And although it had been the right thing to do, it still felt. well words don't describe that feeling.  
  
Warrick had pressed the NURSE emergency button, and a rush of nurses came flooding through the door. Simultaneously Nick and Warrick both realised this could take a little bit of explaining.....................  
  
Hello again! I know this is only a short chapter but it's all due to be wrapped up in the next one. Hopefully chapter 9 will be the end! I hope that people have enjoyed it. Thank you to all who have reviewed. Until next time my little pretties (sorry been watching the wizard of oz way to much!) =) XXX 


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